I once wrote love poems

I once wrote love poems
I could summon up
Emotions that I had not yet felt
A burning for something
Yet unreachable
I loved love before loving boys
I was an eager child
Aching to love
And to be loved

When I met you
You were a poem
A song
The answer to a cry
Coming from deep within me
You glowed like nothing
I’d seen before
Your voice was a melody
That my heart recognised
I felt lucky to give
Even when you withheld
Felt lucky to love
Because I had so much
Love in me
I wrote poems
Where you inhabited every line
My prose were full of you
You, my dream come true

Didn’t ask for flowers
Or love songs
My face plastered on your wall
Or sweet nickname
Along my number on your phone
Didn’t ask you to love me
The way I loved you. Never wondered if you could
Didn’t ask you to stand by me
‘Cause I was strong enough on my own
But cried over your hand missing in mine
When the spotlight shone on me
I cried, cried and cried
But stayed, stayed and stayed
Because you and I were endgame
A beautiful story to tell the world

Now you are one more question left unaswered

I didn’t know then what I know now
That a person can die
From not being loved right
I remember the day it happened
Crying under the rain
Feeling like a main character
As much as it hurt
I was ready to let you go
But you cried and I stayed
Instead I let go of my daydreams

Somewhere a girl was in love
With a boy
Who would drop everything
At a murmur from her
Who proudly told the world
« She chose me »

But that girl wasn’t me

I was the girl who’d get a ring from you
The girl to carry your children
The girl who would look at you one day
Searching for the love that once was
The girl who no longer write love poems
Because she has no love left
To poetize about

Magdalee Brunache

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